It is 5:00 am and I cannot sleep again. There are many things weighing heavily on my heart and mind. I won't put them here.
I stepped outside of the back door this evening and found this little tree just blazing Fall glory with all of its might...the leaves actually seemed to crackle and burn with colour.
Fall is such an appropriate season for letting go...but it is difficult, because the colours call our attention to the beauty of everything that will soon be hidden.
Someone who spoke to A today teasingly mentioned that he wasn't so interested in our things because we've already identified "everything" and have taken the fun out of treasure hunting. I threw back my head and laughed as I thought that over. Everything? Everything? That would take a thousand years!! Time we don't have. So, no. We have not. We've showed you some interesting things. But some things are far beyond us. They aren't listed anywhere. We have to go to the lowest common denominator in those cases and bless the souls who have time to research it and kudos for their recognition of the value of things. We set out on this course as a historical game--we wanted the STORIES of things.
In the meantime, we need to begin work on the bathroom.
Something else amusing did happen in the last day or so that pulled me out of my reverie for a little while.
We had taken two air conditioners the size of car engines out back behind the garage. It is easy money for the "iron men" to take the metal and then get paid for the weight by their scrap yard of choice. We are only too happy to accomodate them. They help us too, by recycling these things.
But there couldn't have been room in their truck for our things. So they left us a gift in return ;)
A stereo turntable from the 1980's. Which was gone by the next night.
Bless all of the night people.
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Comments
Speaking as someone who went on antidepressants as a result of her home renovation, I must simply say that these days will pass. Give yourself a year, and you'll be amazed at your progress. Worry less because, as stupid as it sounds, things really do have a way of working themselves out. Really. Don't be afraid to ask others for help. Often times, friends and family want to come to your aid but are unsure as to what to do. Most importantly, don't overwhelm yourselves. Work hard toward a goal, but remember to take a break afterward.
Posted by: Kitschywoman | October 14, 2003 10:21 AM
That tree looks like an eastern dogwood, a native of the south and lower midwest. Does it have a tiny gray ball at the tips of each branch? If so, it will bloom in early spring before the leaves come out. Enjoy! (I'm a big fan of these trees!)
Posted by: Fran | October 17, 2003 10:51 AM