what you set your heart upon
I haven't written much on the blog in the last few weeks. It isn't that I have run out of things to say about the house and the work on it (oh no!) But my body seems to be working against me these days, which makes posting a bit harder.
Even though I live in Chicago, sometimes my body goes to bed in Apia, Samoa (4 am CST). If I get to bed on time, it wakes up in Praia, Cape Verde. (3 am CST)
Map courtesy of Holt, Rhinehart and Winston
I don't know what this means exactly. Perhaps my body is trying to tell me something. (Something like, "GO! Go to the islands!")
All I know is that it induces a somewhat "zombie-like" state that doesn't feel very healthy or productive.
If I am incoherant for the next few weeks as I try to reset my internal clock, I'll apologize now. Or it may provide some amusing ramblings. Who knows. I guess there is always a bright side, eh?
Meanwhile, this saying keeps sticking in my head. There is a veiled meaning to it that my zombie brain meditates upon. (This was given to us by our friend Parker and is stuck to the refridgerator door.)
All I can think of is this: Dreams come with shadows and you have to battle the shadows to realize the dream.
And the meaning of that in regards to this house? Well, I'm rambling, aren't I? Well, then, off to bed again!
(4)
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Comments
All I can think of is this: Dreams come with shadows and you have to battle the shadows to realize the dream.
This is a good thing for me to remember right now--I'm battling severe writer's anxiety--and feelings of impending failure--trying to finish the dissertation I've been working on for ten years.
Posted by: tully monster | June 24, 2004 1:04 PM
Tully! Here is something for you from Anne Lamott (per Bird by Bird):
"Thirty years ago my older brother, who was ten years old at the time, was trying to get a report on birds written that he'd had three months to write. It was due the next day. We were out at our family cabin in Bolinas, and he was at the kitchen table close to tears, surrounded by binder paper and pencils and unopened books on birds, immobilized by the hugeness of the task ahead. Then my father sat down beside him, put his arm around my brother's shoulder, and said, 'Bird by bird, buddy. Just take it bird by bird.'"
And here is one more thing Good News about First Drafts
I also appreciated the comment in your journal yesterday, June 23rd, on the Jack Ryan thing. I can't believe no one is covering it from that angle. Has the media become irredeemably shallow?
Posted by: jm | June 24, 2004 1:52 PM
Wow. That's so weird. I have Bird by Bird sitting on my shelf at work here, and not long after I posted that comment, I took it down, quite by impulse, and read that very essay...and the next one, about first drafts. And now I see what you've posted in response...
OK. I'm a confirmed skeptic, but this is a sign!!!
As for the Jack Ryan thing...looks like pretty soon it'll be moot--they're working on their "exit strategy."
Posted by: tully monster | June 24, 2004 3:04 PM
I think what Emerson was trying to say was, be careful what you ask for. You might get it....POPS"30"
Posted by: POPS | June 25, 2004 11:47 AM