In solidarity with Jocelyn from Chicago Two-Flat, I am posting the most recent pictures of my house-related boo boo's. Though I have to say that a) hers is more ouchy than mine and I hate getting stung by anything, and b) mine are accompanied by a lame story about how I sustained my injuries. Jocelyn's boo boo is to be admired because she EARNED HERS through working hard weeding her lovely garden. Mine? I got mine because I am a spastic dope. (This is a photo of my right elbow.)
Also...both knees look like this.
Mine is only house-related insomuch as it came about because work was being done TO our house...and I wasn't doing it. Instead, I was enjoying the non-fume-filled air and high life over at my in-law's comfortable bungalow with Grace in tow. YET! My old enemies found me there.
Late at night, I was laying in the hallway at the top of their circular staircase when I couldn't sleep so I could read without waking Aaron or the baby. I was flat on my stomach on the carpet, engrossed in a Studs Terkel book. The door to the baby's room was directly in front of me and I was at peace, very cozy, small dish of ice cream. Newly showered. Life was good.
It is important that I diagram this for you so that you can understand what happened. Plus, I am a geek that way.
Anyway, I'm laying on the carpet, all into Stud's prose, when out from under the baby's bedroom door, across the carpet, towards my face and under my book runs this big, black spider.
You'd have been proud of me. I flicked the book closed with my hand, grabbed my shoe off of my foot, and squashed that thing flat. BOOM! No contest. Back to reading. It is important to note that, before the HouseInProgress, I could not willingly be within ten feet of any spider. Ever. I even calculated the speed a spider could run IF it was the size of a person because...well, I am a geek that way.
So, I'm back to reading Studs, when I look up and I see this heading towards me on the carpet from under the baby's bedroom door.
(photo courtesy of BugGuide.net)
That was when I screamed and threw myself up in the air so quickly that I slammed my elbow (and funny bone) into the metal railing as well as getting carpet burns on both knees.
I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE
It ran right at my face just like the spider did, but faster because...duh...more legs.
Then it veered off towards the wall while I was peeling myself off of the ceiling. I had almost hightailed it back into the room where Aaron was staying when I thought, "WAIT! What if it goes BACK into the baby's room?"
So, I took off my shoe and chased that sucker down like a proper mama bear should. Ground it right into the carpet. With my left hand, though, because my right arm was dangling uselessly from the elbow.
Then I ate my ice cream like the cold-hearted thousand legger killer I have become.
Home improvement is making me mean and scarred, isn't it?